Can I be a surrogate if I have a job?
Great news! You can have a job while you are a surrogate!
If you have a job and plan to be a surrogate, there are a few things to keep in mind.
1. Expect to miss some work.
If you work weekdays, you will need to miss work for medical and psychological screenings, clinic visits, the embryo transfer day & possibly the day after the transfer, OB appointments, and of course, the delivery and recovery. If you work evenings or weekends, your work schedule shouldn’t be affected as much since the screenings are done during normal business hours on weekdays. However, you will need to plan to take the day off for the embryo transfer and possibly the following day, because you will need to rest. If you’re required to travel for any of these appointments, you will miss more time. Unfortunately, we also need to consider the possibility of being put on bed rest. Breaking the news to your employer that you were unexpectedly put on bed rest is never a fun conversation but knowing that it is a possibility well in advance can help everyone plan for various scenarios.
2. Depending on the nature of your job, you may need to request job modifications.
Employers are required to make reasonable accommodations for pregnant employees. Some reasonable accommodations include more frequent restroom breaks and the ability to sit more frequently than typically would be allowed, if necessary. Jobs that are physically or mentally taxing may be challenging during pregnancy. We are here to support you in your surrogacy journey and make this experience as easy as possible for everyone involved, and no one wants your surrogacy journey to cause any tension for you with your employer. You may need to consider whether this is the right time to be a surrogate as there are some physical work environments that may not be the best during surrogacy.
3. You’ll need to be health-conscious.
Of course, surrogates go through a screening process to ensure they are in the appropriate health to carry a child for someone else. In addition to eating well, exercising appropriately, taking prenatal vitamins, and taking care of your mental well-being, you’ll also need to take measures to ensure that you don’t get sick. This includes frequent handwashing and staying away from others who are ill when possible. This is especially important for those whose jobs require physical contact with people or things that people frequently touch, such as cash.
4. People will assume you’re pregnant with your own baby, and if they know you’re a surrogate, they’ll ask questions.
Eventually, strangers will notice that you’re pregnant. Some people will want to know the sex of the baby, if you’ve picked out a name, if it’s your first child, etc. If they know you’re a surrogate, that opens a whole new realm of questions. It’s up to you what you share with people. Some surrogates with jobs that require them to see the same people regularly may choose to explain that they’re a surrogate to avoid awkward conversations about why they don’t have a baby after they give birth. Some surrogates who don’t see the same people repeatedly may find it easier not to mention that it’s a surrogacy pregnancy. Personally, my favorite thing about working during my surrogacy pregnancy was having the opportunity to talk to others about surrogacy and answer their questions about it. Since I worked closely with the public and live in a small community, it was easier for me to tell people. I saw it as an avenue to bring awareness of less traditional ways to build a family and to be an example of an average person who helped another family, just in case someone looking into surrogacy thought it was out of the realm of possibility. Of course, you don’t have to explain that it’s a surrogacy pregnancy if you don’t want to.
Many surrogates have worked throughout their surrogacy journeys without issues. Remember that working during any pregnancy can be a lot to juggle, and surrogacy requires more preparation and time away from work than traditional pregnancy. If you feel you are able to manage both, don’t let having a job discourage you from looking into surrogacy. If you have questions, please reach out!