My Relationship with the Babies and Parents After the Birth

During the past five years, I have been blessed to have helped two families grow. My first surrogacy journey was with a family that lived in China. My relationship with the twins and their parents remains strong years later. The parents were so grateful and thankful that I was able to deliver their two healthy sons and I was so amazed at what I carried for them. We continue to send photographs and updates back and forth of our families to this day. The parents of the boys want them to know me and my family as I was able to bring them into the world. We are starting to plan our next group gathering, hopefully, we will all be able to get together in the next year or so. 

The relationship with the parents on my second surrogacy journey is not as strong or consistent. Our families get along wonderfully but we have different styles in life. Our bond hasn’t developed as naturally as our first journey. We both reach out and share pictures every so often but nothing more. My second journey made me realize that people respond differently to relationships and that is perfectly okay.

Either way, I have come to accept what will be will be. Trying to prepare yourself for what may come after the delivery can be a challenge as you won’t know how you will respond. We all deal with emotions in very different ways. If this is your first time being a surrogate, be prepared to be surprised at how you may respond and how your intended parents may respond. Be kind to yourself, be careful with your expectations, and know that no matter what the outcome is, you are helping to bring children into the world.  Be sure to have support systems in place and don’t be afraid to reach out to others.  Talking and sharing about your feelings and experiences can be very healing and helpful.

Are you ready to become a surrogate?